As I stand in the backyard of our home, the breeze feels cool and crisp, the sunflowers, once stoic and yellow are now brown and drooping, the first leaves on our beloved maple tree have started to turn red, and for the first time in months, I feel change. I take a deep breath and continue to notice the small, but sweet details around me. The soft purple flowers on the newly planted honeysuckle vine, my annual blooms beginning to wilt, the tractors and toys thrown about, the aftermath of kids at play. I feel the changing season upon us, reflecting on our adventure filled summer, the warm evenings spent in this yard, the dirt covered babies playing.

Amidst the felt sense of changing seasons, I acknowledge where else change is showing up in my life. I’m filled with conflicting emotions as we initiate and welcome more change. We are planning to sell our house, our first house, which is so much more than a house. We have spent countless late nights scrambling to finish projects, taking advantage of sleeping kids and quiet. This house looks very different than the day we bought it, every change thoughtfully discussed and dreamt up. Little hands helping along the way.

And there are bigger dreams ahead. More spaces to create, more halls to play chase down, new experiences to be had, more gardens to be planted, more seeds to sow and more growth to be had.

I recently saw this quote by Jack Kornfield and it came at the exact right moment. As we welcome a shift towards the new.

“Whatever we cultivate in times of ease, we gather as strength in times of change.” -Jack Kornfield

As I am preparing for change, asking for it, I become curious about my own ability. My capacity for change. My flexibility. My resilience. My children’s ability to navigate transitions. As Jack implies, the strength and ability you have to navigate change, comes from what you cultivate in times of ease. You play, how you practice.

So how am I practicing?

I think there’s a lot of ways we can prepare ourselves for the unknown, for the inevitable change coming our way. For me, I think about how I handle change and reflect on times when I’ve handled it well, versus the times I’ve struggled. This largely seems to be dependent on my state of being prior to the change. The way I was practicing for that change. If I was in a good place, grounded and connected, I took the change in stride. If I felt anxious and overwhelmed, the change almost broke me.

So what’s the secret? For me, it’s about cultivating a life of connection and meaning. It’s about learning to reconnect with yourself. Over and over again. Because too often our lives promote disconnection. It’s about knowing your worth. Deeply. It’s about understanding your strengths. It’s about living a life aligned with our values and who we are. It’s about doing whatever works for you. Because then we know what it feels like, it’s familiar, it’s our baseline. And we can get back there when we stray. We can lean on this way of being during times of change.

I guess there’s also two types of change. The kind you ask for and plan. The kind you’re prepared for, waiting for. Then there’s the kind that comes unannounced, maybe it’s even unwelcome. In either situation, although the latter may be more difficult, you’ll draw from what you know.

For my own preparation, holding intentionality, I plan to ensure balance and connection over the next few months. When I feel anxiousness creeping in, I will ground myself. I will breathe. When I feel overwhelmed, I will make steps towards clarity. I will hold perspective, reminding myself of the bigger picture, the bigger dream. I will cultivate quality moments of connection and stillness for my family. Before and alongside the busy. I will be the model for my children, so they also learn to cultivate what they are needing.

Are you cultivating a life that fosters self connection and joy? What are you cultivating? What is your baseline? Are you prepared for change? Unexpected or planned? Because Jack knows, it’s important stuff. The stuff of life maybe. And the stuff that will help guide you when shit gets real.

Be sweet to yourself,

Holly